Slave Dog Journalists of Southern California
(Verbatim • Media)
Dear pathetic inky wretch – this is to inform you that the New Raiders of the San Diego Union-Tribune now own your brain neurons, your future intentions and your sphinter muscle. All your base are belong to us:
SDUT
Confidential and Intellectual Property AgreementIn consideration of my employment and/or continued employment by THE SAN DIEGO UNION-TRIBUNE, LLC including any Joint Ventures and existing or future subsidiaries owned or controlled directly or indirectly by THE SAN DIEGO UNION-TRIBUNE, LLC (Herinafter “SDUT”), in a capacity in which I may receive and/or contribute information and develop customer goodwill pertaining to the interests of DSUT and in which I may make inventions, discoveries, improvements or suggestions that are related to the present or anticipated business activities of SDUT, and intending to be legally bound, I acknowledge and agree as follows.
1. Any discoveries, improvements, suggestions, copyrightable works (hereinafter referred to as “Intellection Property”) related to the present or anticipated business activities of SDUT that are made or conceived by me, either solely or jointly with others, while in the employ of SDUT, whether during working hours or not, shall be the property of SDUT, whether or not registerable, and I will communicate promptly and do hereby assign to SDUT all rights to such Intellectual Property.
2. During and after the period of my employment by SDUT, I will execute all documents and will assist SDUT in every proper way, without compensation other than the base salary which I received while employed by SDUT, but at SDUT’s expense, to obtain and enforce trademark registrations and copyrights for such Intellectual Property in any and all countries…
4. I will not use for my personal benefit or disclose to others, except in furtherance of my SDUT employment duties or with SDUT’s written consent, either during or subsequent to my employment, any Confidential Information whether or not owned by SDUT to which I gained access or developed during my employement by SDUT. Confidential Information, as used in this Agreement, means trade secrets and other information not generally known in the relevant trade or industry, about products, equipment, processes and services, including information relating to research, production, purchasing, accounting, human resources, engineering, marketing, and selling…
6. Upon cessation of my employment with SDUT, I will promptly deliver to SDUT all records of any nature acquired as a result of my employment by SDUT related to the present or anticipated business of SDUT or the actual or anticipated business activities of SDUT, including any developed or made by me, and my own notes and diaries, and all copies of such records.
7. During the period of my employment with SDUT and for a period of two (2) years thereafter:
(a) I shall provide a copy of this Agreement to any prospective new employer, prior to accepting employment.
(b) I shall not solicit directly or indirectly, any person who is a SDUT employee or who had been employed by SDUT withint the prior six (6) months for employment by, or any business relationship with, a Competitor…9. I concur with SDUT that the provisions of this Agreement are at the date of this Agreement, reasonable in duration and scope. If any one or more of the provisions contained in this Agreement shall for any reason be held to be excessively broad as by a court of competent jurisdiction by which this Agreement may be construed, I along with SDUT hereby request such court to limit and reduce any overly broad provision, so as to make it enfoceable to the extent compatible with the applicable law as it shall then appear…
11. My obligations set forth in Paragraphs 1, 2 and 7 shall be binding upon my heirs, legal representatives and assigns. SDUT shall have the right to assign this Agreement without my consent…
13. Any breach or violation by me of the Agreement, including but not limited to Paragraphs 4 and 7, will result in immediate and irreparable injury to SDUT in amounts difficult to ascertain. Therefore, should I breach any portion of this agreement, I agree that SDUT shall be entitled to proceed directly to court to obtain the remedies of specific performance and injunctive relief (including but limited to temporary restraining orders, preliminary injunctions, and permanent injunctions) without the necessity of posting a bond or other undertaking therewith…
14. Furthermore, out of enduring gratitude for the abiding generosity of SDUT and its attorneys, owners and forebears, I hereby agree that, whenever reqested either verbally, by nod, wink, gesture or text message, to affably kneel and place the tender genetalia of said generous beings between my lovingly grateful lips until such suckfest is concluded by mutal consent of the parties to this Agreement…
Oh wait, we ended up striking that last paragraph, right?
→ B.Dunn, May 22, 2009, 10 16 pm
